 Twyman L. Towery |
 Volume 13 - Report 1 June, 2010
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Twyman L. Towery |
Volume 13 - Report 1 June, 2010
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| In fact, a "silent pause" can be a powerful weapon. "A WISE PERSON WILL NOT GIVE YOU A STRAIGHT ANSWER – IMMEDIATELY." - Twyman But a foolish person (which includes many of us) feels compelled to answer whatever we are asked, as soon as we are asked, no matter where or when we are asked. Just because someone wants an immediate opinion doesn’t mean we should, or have any obligation to do any more than say, “Let me think about that.” Why? Because: "WISE MEN ARE
NOT ALWAYS SILENT, BUT THEY KNOW WHEN TO BE." It is hard to improve upon Abraham Lincoln’s advice on this subject: "IT IS BETTER TO REMAIN SILENT AND BE THOUGHT A FOOL THAN TO SPEAK OUT AND REMOVE ALL DOUBT."So give yourself the advantage in the situation and take a cue from the “King of The Pause” in comedic timing, Jack Benny, when he said: "IT'S NOT SO MUCH KNOWING WHEN TO SPEAK, BUT WHEN TO PAUSE."We make a big-to-do about how good of a speaker someone is, but you never hear about their skill with "the pause". Mark Twain cautions us: "THE RIGHT WORD MAY BE EFFECTIVE, BUT NO WORD WAS EVER AS EFFECTIVE AS A RIGHTLY TIMED PAUSE." |
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| So, "pause" a moment and think about your organization’s readiness to capitalize on the business recovery that is picking up steam. Organizations don’t adjust automatically – they must be led back to success. Plan your manager's retreat with Twyman and lead your organization toward teamwork and success. 615 758-9623 | |||
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| In both business and personal matters, a question is often not really a question, but instead an attempt to get us to agree with a position the other person has already adopted. So, caution about motive is sadly necessary with certain people. - To give us time to consider that a question may be a set-up to make us look bad in front of others and damage our standing in the organization. Someone may ask for a piece of inconsequential, buried information that is meaningless. But their goal is to make us look incompetent in front of our management group. My guess is that we have all been victim to this type of trap – I know I have. - To allow time to think, really think, through our response and consider the various ramifications of our answer before it is out on the table, never to be retrieved. - To take time to analyze the situation to be sure that we are about to agree to something because it is our best judgment and not because that is the way the “wind is blowing.” After all: "WHENEVER YOU FIND YOURSELF ON THE
SIDE OF THE MAJORITY, IT IS TIME TO PAUSE AND REFLECT." The great wordsmith went on to say: "THE PAUSE-THAT IMPRESSIVE SILENCE, THAT ELOQUENT SILENCE, THAT GEOMETRICALLY PROGRESSIVE SILENCE, WHICH OFTEN ACHIEVES A DESIRED EFFECT WHERE NO COMBINATION OF WORDS, HOWSOEVER FELICITOUS, COULD ACCOMPLISH IT." A pause is not just a defensive maneuver, but also helps us re-direct the conversation. For example: |
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| Maybe it is because the business revival, we aren’t sure, but Twyman’s books are flying out by the cartons. People are obviously looking for positive motivation after a depressing period of lay-offs, extra work, long hours and job worries. They make great study guides for weekly or monthly meetings and allow you to apply their principles to your organization. Click here to order our titles or call 615-758-9623 for volume discounts. |
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| "OFTEN THERE IS
ELOQUENCE IN A SILENT LOOK." For instance, when someone attempts to provoke us with anger, just remember that: "SILENCE IS THE SUREST
WAY TO DIFFUSE ANGER, FOR IT GIVES IT NOWHERE TO GO." All of us want to be effective communicators, but we make the mistake of thinking that always requires words. Emily Dickinson pointed out that: "SAYING NOTHING SOMETIMES SAYS THE MOST."I think back to the “Kiddie” Matinees many of us grew up with. The silence of our heroes was often ridiculed by the bad guys with taunts, insults and drinks thrown in their faces. But Gene Autry, Roy Rogers and the others with a white hat would sit and take it, often to our chagrin, because they knew this: "NEVER FORGET THE
POWER OF SILENCE, THAT MASSIVELY DISCONCERTING PAUSE WHICH GOES ON
AND ON AND MAY AT LAST INDUCE AN OPPONENT TO BABBLE AND BACKTRACK
NERVOUSLY." And it worked, for our heroes NEVER lost and the bad guys backtracked, OR ELSE! |
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You
and your manager/executives are not in a popularity contest, but rather
a test of your effectiveness, creativity and teamwork against that
of your competitors. The battle with your competition is almost never
a “win-win” project, but a serious fight to compete and
win Plan your strategy at a management retreat with Twyman. Call 615
758-9623. |
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| Mahatma Gandhi understood this phenomenon when he reasoned: "THE MORE EFFICIENT A FORCE IS, THE MORE SILENT AND THE MORE SUBTLE IT IS." Knowing the value of silence is also crucial in friendship, for constant banter is not always necessary, or even helpful: "THE MIRACLE OF FRIENDSHIP CAN BE
SPOKEN WITHOUT WORDS….HEARING UNSPOKEN NEEDS, RECOGNIZING SECRET
DREAMS, UNDERSTANDING THE SILENT THINGS THAT ONLY A TRUE FRIEND WOULD
KNOW." We can easily visualize the aura of two close friends communing together: "THE PIPE, WITH SOLEMN INTERPOSING
PUFF, MAKES HALF A SENTENCE AT A TIME ENOUGH; THE DOZING SAGES DROP
THE DROWSY STRAIN, THEN PAUSE, AND PUFF – AND SPEAK, AND PAUSE
AGAIN." I would bring up the example of the Indians and Cavalry passing the peace pipe around as they talked, but that really didn’t work out too well for the Indians. But, you know what I mean. Selective silence on the part of true leaders sends a powerful signal to the “rank-and-file” that momentous events are about to take place. Winston Churchill understood this when he remarked: "WHEN THE EAGLES ARE SILENT, THE PARROTS BEGIN TO JABBER." So, don’t be cajoled into speaking or answering until you are damn well ready. From a personal standpoint, not possessing this skill in the past cost me tremendously, both in money and innumerable intangibles, all because I said O.K., when all I HAD to say was, “I’ll give that some thought and get back to you.” Simple as that! Now you don’t have to make the same mistake. We humans require solitude of thought. As Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote: "LET US BE SILENT
THAT WE MAY HEAR THE WHISPERS OF THE GODS." Carpe
diem
(Seize the day) REMINDER, TWYMAN HAS MOVED: Please update your address book. 227 CITADEL DRIVE, MT. JULIET, TN 37122 - PHONE 615 758-9623. The New Book is Out! WISDOM OF WOLVES "Leadership Lessons from Nature"
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| ....more
of Twyman's Books Twyman will be glad to autograph and personalize your orders. These are gifts that last a lifetime. |
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| MEDIATE - DON'T LITIGATE
Save money, feelings, reputations and time. Twyman is qualified in both civil and family mediation. Got a troublesome situation? Call 615-758-9623 Website: http://www.twymantowery.com E-mail: tt@twymantowery.com This Newsletter and Twyman's website are created by TnOutdoorsmen |
