Sad, but true. My "bachelors pad" home has been burglarized twice by worker-criminals. Since I am away so much I was beside myself after the first robbery and asked friends what to do. The unanimous advice was to install a comprehensive security system, which I blissfully ignored, assuming that it wouldn't happen again. Wrong. After the second heist, I couldn't move fast enough to follow their advice.

"ADVICE IS PROBABLY THE ONLY FREE THING WHICH PEOPLE WON'T TAKE."
- Lothar Kaul

Maybe this is because we often don't place worth on things that are free.

The second robbery really cleaned me out and I found out the thief (who was fixing my plaster walls during the day) was a gun toting ex-con who later shot another robbery victim. While I slept, he took my car keys out of my bedroom (hey, you gotta have something to haul your loot away with). So, I had a really good SCARE, which propelled me to finally take their ADVICE.

"A WORD TO THE WISE AIN'T NECESSARY, IT'S THE STUPID ONES WHO NEED THE ADVICE."
- Bill Cosby

Sure I was stupid and needed the advice, which I eventually took, but "the pig was out of the slop" by then.

"WHEN WE ASK FOR ADVICE, WE ARE USUALLY LOOKING FOR AN ACCOMPLICE."
- Charles Varlet de la Grange

I read Erica Jong's book, "Fear of Flying" all the way from New York to Tehran on one trip and never did understand it, or why so many women were so jazzed up about it. But I get it when she says:

"ADVICE IS WHAT WE ASK FOR WHEN WE ALREADY KNOW THE ANSWER BUT WISH WE DIDN'T."
- Erica Jong

When we ask someone for advice, we have often already decided what we are going to do and are simply looking for an "Amen" corner.

"GOOD ADVICE IS OFTEN ANNOYING - BAD ADVICE NEVER IS."
- French proverb

Unfortunately, when we ask for advice, it is usually because we have a problem, and problems don't tend to make us feel good. So we search for someone to confirm our plan to cure the problem and make us feel better at the same time, thus mixing up advising and stroking. In truth:

"ADVICE IS SELDOM WELCOME; AND THOSE WHO WANT IT THE MOST ALWAYS LIKE IT THE LEAST."
- Earl of Chesterfield

But that doesn't mean it doesn't work. I DON'T AGREE with the following:

"IF IT'S FREE, IT'S ADVICE; IF YOU PAID FOR IT, IT'S COUNSELING; IF YOU CAN USE EITHER ONE, IT'S A MIRACLE."
- Jack Adams (1838 - 1918) US historian, author.

The key to successful "advice taking" is to be honest in your quest for advice and discerning in your subsequent actions. Often you must:

"FOLLOW THE ADVICE OF ONE WHO MAKES YOU CRY, NOT FROM THE ONE WHO MAKES YOU LAUGH."
- Arabian proverb

If you believe that problems really are "opportunities," then look for a proper course of action, not a back-rub and slap on the back. There are some places to definitely NOT go to for advice. For instance:

"THE ADVICE OF FOXES IS DANGEROUS FOR CHICKENS. "
- Spanish proverb

Duh! But, I've actually asked someone on "the other side" of a negotiation for advice in a tricky situation, thinking our past friendship and mutual professional respect would overcome avarice. It didn't! I was desperate - and dumb! I should have honored the Congolese proverb warning that:

"THE IRON NEVER GIVES ADVICE TO THE HAMMER."

A rule of thumb is to:

"NEVER TRUST THE ADVICE OF A MAN IN DIFFICULTY."
- Japanese proverb

No matter how much a person desires to help you, or thinks they are helping you, the difficulties they are presently encountering on their own "journey" makes it difficult for them to visualize the road ahead for you.

"NEVER TAKE THE ADVICE OF SOMEONE WHO HAS NOT HAD YOUR KIND OF TROUBLE."

Of course, this is an overstatement, for we don't necessarily have to fall down a well to wisely advise others to avoid open wells. But, in the business and professional world, we have become so specialized that it is often difficult to understand the nuances of situations that we have not experienced. Yes, experience does matter. Big time!